say hello to better night's sleep. wheee

Finally! My Sealy mattress is here. so shiok! but i can't seem to nap without Baby by my side. So sian. I rather be washing my hair or doing a facial.

its the end of Feb already. 2 months down, 8 months to go to my wedding day. And I feel like I haven done much. Im such a bad planner. Plus it doesn't help much that Kenneth and I are both such laid back pple. Pfft.

I don't even know what we should do. People keep saying we must be really busy planning for the wedding. But truth is.... I tink im busier with work and MJ in between trying to spend time with Baby among our hectic schedule.

Im kinda getting worried that the whole wedding will be screwed up and a big disaster. Im praying hard that everything will just go smoothly. *please God*

Thank God! We got our queue no for Dawson @ Queenstown. Freaking no 44. Whats the odds! Just when Ken & I are planning to buy over the 3rm Potong Pasir flat because its more affordable and forfeit our Dawson plans, we gotta have this queue no. Now we're in a big big dilemma.

The moment we saw the queue no, all practical plans of budgeting and saving just went out the window. Im so excited bout the high ceiling and balcony!!!!

The cons bout Dawson:-

1. Expensive

2. Small

Pros:-

1. High Celing

2. Balcony

3. Location

4. MRT not LRT

im so excited. so excited. wheeeeee?

should i get Dawson or not? how? how? how?

im so hungry. gotta eat

weekend. please don't go so soon

FINALLY. Weekend is here again. Please please don't go by so soon.

Just finished my mahjong game. :) So happy. Baby gotta work tomorrow. But I'll be going for my facial to save my ugly pimple face. GAH.

Im so freaking broke. Yup. Even though its just after CNY, but for a fact, I did not get much ang pows. Ang pows seems to be shrinking every year. Plus the fact that Kenneth & I lost quite a bit at Blackjack. But managed to recover a little from MJ. So well.

im broke broke broke with so much stuff to pay. Just gave a deposit for the photographer & videographer. So expensive!! weddings are such expensive events. Zzzzz.

The one good thing today. My leave is blocked. Wheeehooo..... Im going to Hong KOng. I can't wait for my break. But first. I gotta save money. No more shopping! At all. Plus I gotta get through month of March. No PH!!!! Die.....

Second thing - I definitely and very determine to lose weight. I must lose weight. Im getting a little fleshy. A little chubby. Which means... Im getting FAT! im so sad.

I need to lose weight. I neeeeeed to lose weight.

I just bought 30 bucks worth of chocolates and candies from Candy Empire. I wanna shoot myself. So sinful. BUT I CAN'T help myself. :(

how? how? how? I went to gym yesterday. Ran 5 mins on the threadmill and I almost collapsed. Decided to do some weights. Did bout 50 reps, muscle felt achy. Went to do the step master. Another 5 mins, my lungs could barely get oxygen. Decided to stop and do weights again. Did like 20 reps. Muscle couldn't take it. I gave up.

Went to Sakae Sushi to fill my tummy. Spent like 20mins at the gym including changing time, spent 1hr eating.

Im such a failure!!!

ok. so sleepy.

yahoooooo

Like finally! weekend is here... wheeee.....

work is super duper torturous. If I have to deal with another crazy customer screaming in my ear. I swear I will freaking vomit! I hate it when they say, "I wan to complain!" You see.... I really dun understand what this sentence means. What are u trying to say? U wan to complain to someone else? U wanna complain to me? Or wanna complain bout me? Or complain bout the issue? Sometimes customers really make me confused.

Then after they finish complaining they say they wanna go elsewhere. GO LA! I really really dun care! Its frustrating, irritating and tiring. I hope Joeren stays. Or else its really gonna be crap without those girls.

Other than that my life is pretty ok. after work, that is.

I have been waiting so long for this short break from work. Im so happy its finally here. But Baby still gotta work tomorrow. Sian.

My face is breaking out. Must be too stressful at work. Gah! Im so ugly now. :(

Im not a very loyal user of FB. But its actually quite a interesting platform! Through FB I found a guy I used to know during my growing up years. Im so happy!! Although he looks so diff, it feels.... nice to 'see' him again. I dunnoe why. All i remembered was he was such a sweetheart! :)

CNY is such a tiring festival. Going places. Smiling. Making small talk with relatives who dun really care bout u. But the good thing is.... spending time with love ones! I wanna eat my mama's mee sua. Yummy!

so sleepy.

Lazy Sat...

Its such a lazy lazy afternoon, what a pity Kenneth is at work but at least he's gonna be off soon.

Anyways, after the past months of torture, I tink im finally getting used to working in an office. I tink i might actually like my work after all.... of course being at the branch is what I really enjoy. But I guess I just forgot bout the shit that come with working at the branch. The working hours and the siao siao pple.

I still deal with a lot of siao siao pple now. But Im still deciding which is worse. Being screamed at on the phone or being screamed at in your face.

The Piano is finally our of my home and I have more space now. Now I need some ideas on what I should do with the corner.

I feel happy that today I spent some time with MaMa and she finally let me drive her car! She was tired after all the driving and walking that she surrendered her car to me. WooHoo. Its really easy driving a auto car but her car is huge! I had lunch with her and spent some time shopping. She wanted to see the ballroom that Kenneth and I choose. She really loved it which is goood.

I really love that woman. She's just so cute! Going to some fish farm for dinner. Looking forward to the company but not the place Nic chose. -.-

....

work is horrid horrid horrible. Im struggling everyday. I feel stuck and tortured.

Mon to Fri are absolute torture.

But I guess the grass is always greener on the other side. when im back at UOB I'll prolly be miserable too. Will I? I really really dunnoe....

I dunnoe what is the matter with me.... am I juz lazy....

but im definitely not giving up so easily.

i must hang on.....

on the other hand, im really really excited bout being engaged.

but its really quite a hassle to plan for a wedding not to mention EXPENSIVE.

everything is money money money.

*SIGH*

the place that we have managed to booked is Grand Copthorne. the ballroom is really really pretty. which I like.

but then the reality of planning for a wedding hits me when I realise that I need to source for a whole lot of stuff...

photographers

videographer

bridal shops+photo shoots

make up artist (settled)

caterer

bridal car

etc etc

*faints*

I have been dreaming of getting married for so long, and now that it is finally happening.

I feel unprepared and worried and scared and wish I can postpone it further.

I feel like I need more time to prepare and plan.

people able to help, please help me and recommend good people for stuff stated above.

it would save me the trouble of sourcing around. :) but not too expensive please.

Happy!

This is one of my best christmas ever. :)

Im still slightly overwhelmed... its still all so surreal to me...

Having my closest people around me, I felt so contented and blessed.

Kenneth, Samuel and Keong did a very very good job of keeping me in the dark. :p

Never knew that Kenneth could pull off something like this.

Im impressed.

I can't express the thanks that I have to give to Sam and Keong for sacrificing their Christmas eve to be part of my blissful moment.

Thank you baby for all the effort.

I love u all!

HoHOHo

God is good. THank God for his providence and it was a miracle that Ken's parents came to church with us last night too. I was so happy they were there.

Emo-tions :)

Today is Kenneth's first day of work. He sounds bored. First days are always like that.

Im soooooo not looking forward to my first day. I have one more day left to slack and I dun want it to end!!!

I went for my regular brazilian wax and followed by my facial. Since ken drove the van to work I had to go everywhere by cab and mrt.

The facial feels so good. Ahhh.. SHiok!

I dun want to go back to work!!!!! boooohooooo. But no work no money. I wish i can earn money doin nothing. blah.

had a small tiny teeny weeny quarrel with Ken yesterday. thank goodness it was resolved quicky. cant stand being angry or fed up or sad. too tiring. I want to be happy everyday! :) Thanx for makin me such a happy girl every single day baby!

Wed im starting work.... hopefully the job is fine and I will have good colleagues. *crosses fingers*

the past one month spent bumming around was GOOOOOD. But time passes too fast. too too fast. And I haven even went for a holiday. hmmp. hopefully we will both do well in our jobs. wheeee.

sometimes I feel like I always wanna hear the truth. but yet sometimes Im afraid I can't handle the truth. Sometimes I know im Too in my own world. Prolly got to do with the facts that Im a only child. But yet why im not a complete weirdo... i have to thank my cousins that I grew up with. I was always home alone with my maid in a big house and no one to play with. I would play with my Barbie dolls. I had a lot of Barbie dolls. And talk to myself.

But thankfully I had my cousins to play badminton, catch spiders, play catching, nintendo. So I managed to grow up pretty normal. Juz a little weird.

But ocassionally I would still talk to myself. Kenneth has on many occasions caught me talking to myself. So embarrassing. but after all this, i still have to say. I feel safer in my own world. The real world is so harsh. So scary full of bad pple. I dun really like them. I tink I'll just stay here. :)

ok time for dinner.

Another item on my wish list

Number 56) Go to korea for plastic surgery.
Almost every korean girl seems to be like super hot, super cute, super sexy or super somthing. I figure I could go there to buy a new face, hopefully look like that. heehee

I am a fat pig

Kenneth is out playing golf and Im all alone at home letting my thoughts run wild. Which I kinda like. Time to myself... to spend emo-ing.

I was suppose to go with him but I wanted to stay home to catch PCK on TV. I know... I know. Im damn auntie.
After a almost exactly a month of staying home and not working. I have to admit... I AM still pretty lost... I dunnoe what to tink, Im juz enjoying my butter hokkaido squid. Yummy. Im really really getting fat. With all the junk that im munching on every single day with no exercise. Pretty soon im getting cellulite. The very thought of that just makes me wanna crrrryyyy........boohoohooo... *munch munch*

what do we have to do to be very happy? what do we have to own to be very happy?? what do we have to have?? I said very happy. Cuz im happy now... but somehow I need more. more money? actually make that money since I dun have any now. Or a big car????? We're kinda eyeing the Hyundai i30. But cannot afford. :( or a job that gives satisfaction??
Jobs that gives satisfaction pays low. and those im intersted to have, I have no experience. And those that I can apply for I.. im not excited bout it. this sucks.

this sotong strips are good!!!! can't stop chewing on them.........

empty thoughts

I seriously have too much time on my hands and starting to tink too much. I have fallen sick therefore I can't go out to meet clients. And I can't do anything much cuz im so damn weak. Im so bored.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

i wish to back to how I once was. little expectations. while working i felt lost in a never ending race. everyday was just looking forward to lunch. after lunch look forward to finishing work and after work so not looking forward to waking up the next morning. Such a vicious cycle for 3 years.

Hopefully i'll use this time to tink bout life... tink bout what Im becoming. take some time to spend time with people I love.

kenneth and I are such different people. I wonder what is it that makes us able to last all this while.
He is like super outdoors and I hate the sun.
He is super good at keeping friendships with many people while I only need a few close friends.
He is so positve and Im super negative bout everything.
He is so healthy and strong and Im always sick.

I love being alone... watching movies. I love being alone reading my storybooks. But Im glad that Ken came into my life and introduced so many interesting characters to me. =)

Talking bout interesting characters... I miss my friends. But its like not the same anymore.. Maybe it's me that have changed??? Most prolly its me. kinda sad tough but I know theres always the usual few that I can count on. as what I always say. I dun need a lot. I just need a few good ones. =D most of my friends around me are such sweethearts. I really really appreciate u guys a lot. I wonder what I would do without u guys. Sam, Jac, Alicia..... etc


I need to recover quick....

sick sick sick

im having a migraine attack again. this sux.

feeling super super sick and weak. Just when I do not have free medical anymore... I fall sick. boo.

Went for 'guasha' this morning. really cannot take it anymore. blocked ears and migraine. SO XIN KU!!!

thank goodness for Kenneth. I was so weak I can barely eat on my own. After each mouth of noodles I gotta lie down. So in the end I laid in bed while kenneth spoon fed me. Thank you baby. What would I do without u.

hopefully i'll get well soon. Please God.... Heal me... I cannot take it anymore... Im so tired of sleeping. =(

Celebration??

Im like counting down to my unemployed days.... part of me feels relieved, part of me feels scared. A little part of me feels excited of whats to come.

Today marks the day of another chapter of my life. Where Ken and I stop having regular income. its such a scary thought but yet..... i have yet to feel the worry. Instead im looking forward to my break.
Yesterday my boss & colleagues came together to have dinner to "celebrate" my leaving the bank. I feel sad to leave that bunch of people. After working with them all this time, it is indeed difficult and sad to not see them everyday and talk, gossip and complain. But I tink it is something I have to do.......

Hopefully God will bless me and everything will go well. Wheee...

I finally did it~

I finally did it. I finally am leaving my job. It wasn't a easy decision, but it was something i had to do.

And after handing up the letter, i felt relieved. I felt free...... something which have been weighing down on me for so long... juz disappeared.

But the feeling only lasted for a while. Now im thinking of what comes next.

Whats my next move?

Many people says I should find a job before leaving. Some say I should not leave.

Well.... I don't know. But im crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. =D

I bloody suffered from sleepless night last nite. It was so torturous!!! Now its a damn bloody lethargic Sunday for me where im so tired and can't bring myself to do anything else except be a couch potato. I did not even go to church! argg. now my throat hurts. my face is itchy. my nose is running. All because of lack of sleep. THis sux!

The worst thing is I NEED TO WORK TOMORROW. I have 3 weeks left to my notice period and I am so looking forward to it.

bleah

I got really nothing fun or exciting to write about. Haven done anything new. Anything fun. anything exciting. I haven done anything at all for the past few weeks.

Weekdays have been spent working and weekends have been spent alone.

I don't exactly feel lonely when Ken is working. I feel....... bored.

But when im at work I feel bored too. Its like I suddenly feel so bored with everything. I really dun know what to do.

I spent Sat with FJ playing mj cuz Kenneth gotta work. Now now its Sunday and I spent my Sunday cleaning the kitchen and doing laundry. Cuz im bored. The weather is too hot to go anywhere plus im broke. Staying home alone really sucks.

But I know, I know Ken gotta work and Im really okie with it. But im juz BORED! I tink i should just take a nap now. I wish I have people to play MJ with me in the afternoon...

Caleb is at Batam now. So annoying. Dunnoe one mth go Batam how many times. I so jealous. me wanna go too.

Received a postcard from Keong in Japan. I tink its been bout 3 weeks he have been away. So I heard they would be moving to China next. Freaking lucky ass those guys. Get to travel to different countries for months. *sigh* me wanna to0.

Actually im still dying for a white x'mas. A nice, quiet, white x'mas. hmmmm.... sounds good. could this year be the year?????

I really dislike my job now. not fun anymore.... I need a new environment. Im passing day by day. Hour by hour. sometimes the days are so long. sometimes the hours pass so fast.

What are we living for? There's gotta be more to life than this.

im going blind looking at jobstreet.com.

I juz feel like I wanna run. I feel like im stuck, cornered.

Sometimes i feel so fed up. Sometimes i feel so tired. Sometimes I feel like running.

Hopefully, this few hours of staring at the website would have some life changing results.

*crosses fingers*

emo monday

I swear my days are just passing me by. today is such a shitty day.

I was suppose to go for my pilates class but right at the very very last min - I had a migraine. Im now alone at home with a pounding headache with no appetite for dinner. argggg....

Kenneth is out working. I really hope things will go well for him. Hopefully he brings home good news later.

This laptop is totally gonna crash. but im too broke to buy a new one!!! I promise myself I will stop spending so much money. save money. save money.

I really really wish to have a break from work. Im getting really tired. I feel like I dunnoe where im headed everyday. Which explains the reason where Im so emo everyday.

I keep dreaming of goin on a holiday. Somewhere near would be great too. Maybe somewhere with a beach? or snowy mountains.

Sigh. But cant. Kenneth gotta work and earn money. I support him wholeheartedly but I really wish to have a holiday. WHY AM I SO POOR!!!

Allan is getting married. the preparations sounds really fun and exciting. =) kinda happy for him. I wanna get married too..... before i get old and crumpled.

A friend uploaded my secondary school pics on Facebook! wahahaha.... I have never seen that pic before in my life. Its like 12 years ago... damn. so much has changed. I looked so carefree and innocent. thinking I have like a bright future ahead of me. And now? Im stuck in a bank. U never know what life has in store for you.

But I guess no matter how shitty life turns out to be. Im glad God loves me enough to keep me by his side. So no matter how shitty life turns out to be. I still have God. wheeeee.......

im not really in the best of moods the past few days. Feel really bored and lost.
am in a damn emo mood the whole day... argg.

This year's birthday... I gotta say its one of the best ever since I turned 18.
Good food, great company and of course... FANTASTIC pressies!!
I loved every single present that I received this year.

I lurvvvvvveeee the porter bag. Thank you all who contributed to it.

I soooo lurveeeeeee the key chain from Monica.

I loveeeeee the Hello Kitty lamp too!!!!

I *heart* u all so much!
U guys make my life great and I can't imagine my life without u guys.

And to finish up. I had a sucky day at work. And Im feeling damn bloody teary today. Must be the PMS. damn the bleeding.

A very Pink Birthday....

My birthday would be up soon... and well... although im happy that my birthday is coming but it kinda feels the same as any other day. I do not have the same excitement I felt when I was young. prolly cuz now it juz means im getting old. Bleah.
But im still gonna try to have a Happy Birthday. =)
To make this birthday a Happy one... I wanna thank my baby!!
Baby, thanx so much for the bicycle. Its really something different. Something I never expect in a million years. It was really a surprise. A really good surprise to find it in the bedroom. Cuz somehow u know that I want a bicycle except cycle to where.... I have no idea yet. hehe
I love it! Its so cuuuutteeeeeeeeeeee..........



FJ!!! U another sweetie. Thank you. thank you. thank you. for the gift. Im so happy!!! Wheeee.....

I love my gifts, Thank you baby, Thank you FJ. HUGZ!!!

FJ, dun be sad k? I will always be around..... to PLAY MJ WITH U!!! =D

anyways, recently i've been so busy with stuff. Busy with my pilates classes, resistance training classes, gym, swimming, work....

Kenneth is also pretty busy with his property stuff, barely get to spend quality time with him. But I wan him to do well and this is his time to shine. So I shall juz keep myself busy and pray that my bf starts earning money. Wheee... then we can go for holiday!

I hate my job. its getting worse. juz completed a powerpoint for big boss and now I gotta do a poster. JIU WO AH!! This sunday I gotta go back to work for system testing. Pffftt. This sucks. The suckier part? I got a party at my own home to celebrate Jac & my bday and I will be late for it. ARGGG!!!

But nevertheless, im looking forward to seeing the gang, its been a while. so well, hopefully it will be fun!

I miss my bf!!! Especially more when Im sick and home alone. boohoohoo

Anyways. Finally!!! its all done and over with. Wheeee....

Got my results and Im very pleased with it. Its more than what I hoped for. Got distinctions for both my modules. Truly truly glad. THANK GOD!

Started my fitness classes and gym sessions last week. Since the first lesson, I have been walking around everyday with an aching abdomen and aching thighs. But Im taking my first step towards a healthy lifestyle. Feels good sweating it out, which is something I have not done for many many years.

Its a Sunday and Kenneth is back in Tekong. This sucks. But well, we bought a new tv!!!! So cool! Its something we both wanted to buy for a pretty long time but could not bear to. But since now the price is right, we bought without any hesitation. And guess what, Im broke again. But still happy. =)

So now im home with my new 37" TV and there is no nice shows on tv. argggg. -.-"" still ended up watchin mobtv on the laptop.

back to work tomorrow and im soooooo not looking forward to it. Feeling really sick since last nite. and have laid in bed the whole day.... but im still feeling really sucky.

Hope I will feel much better tomorrow to be able to make for my fitness class....*sigh*

The show S Factor is getting really exciting, as in bitchy exciting. Its..... entertaining if I have to say. Really, goin to such extents for the approval of men. GAH.