Happy!

This is one of my best christmas ever. :)

Im still slightly overwhelmed... its still all so surreal to me...

Having my closest people around me, I felt so contented and blessed.

Kenneth, Samuel and Keong did a very very good job of keeping me in the dark. :p

Never knew that Kenneth could pull off something like this.

Im impressed.

I can't express the thanks that I have to give to Sam and Keong for sacrificing their Christmas eve to be part of my blissful moment.

Thank you baby for all the effort.

I love u all!

HoHOHo

God is good. THank God for his providence and it was a miracle that Ken's parents came to church with us last night too. I was so happy they were there.

Emo-tions :)

Today is Kenneth's first day of work. He sounds bored. First days are always like that.

Im soooooo not looking forward to my first day. I have one more day left to slack and I dun want it to end!!!

I went for my regular brazilian wax and followed by my facial. Since ken drove the van to work I had to go everywhere by cab and mrt.

The facial feels so good. Ahhh.. SHiok!

I dun want to go back to work!!!!! boooohooooo. But no work no money. I wish i can earn money doin nothing. blah.

had a small tiny teeny weeny quarrel with Ken yesterday. thank goodness it was resolved quicky. cant stand being angry or fed up or sad. too tiring. I want to be happy everyday! :) Thanx for makin me such a happy girl every single day baby!

Wed im starting work.... hopefully the job is fine and I will have good colleagues. *crosses fingers*

the past one month spent bumming around was GOOOOOD. But time passes too fast. too too fast. And I haven even went for a holiday. hmmp. hopefully we will both do well in our jobs. wheeee.

sometimes I feel like I always wanna hear the truth. but yet sometimes Im afraid I can't handle the truth. Sometimes I know im Too in my own world. Prolly got to do with the facts that Im a only child. But yet why im not a complete weirdo... i have to thank my cousins that I grew up with. I was always home alone with my maid in a big house and no one to play with. I would play with my Barbie dolls. I had a lot of Barbie dolls. And talk to myself.

But thankfully I had my cousins to play badminton, catch spiders, play catching, nintendo. So I managed to grow up pretty normal. Juz a little weird.

But ocassionally I would still talk to myself. Kenneth has on many occasions caught me talking to myself. So embarrassing. but after all this, i still have to say. I feel safer in my own world. The real world is so harsh. So scary full of bad pple. I dun really like them. I tink I'll just stay here. :)

ok time for dinner.

Another item on my wish list

Number 56) Go to korea for plastic surgery.
Almost every korean girl seems to be like super hot, super cute, super sexy or super somthing. I figure I could go there to buy a new face, hopefully look like that. heehee

I am a fat pig

Kenneth is out playing golf and Im all alone at home letting my thoughts run wild. Which I kinda like. Time to myself... to spend emo-ing.

I was suppose to go with him but I wanted to stay home to catch PCK on TV. I know... I know. Im damn auntie.
After a almost exactly a month of staying home and not working. I have to admit... I AM still pretty lost... I dunnoe what to tink, Im juz enjoying my butter hokkaido squid. Yummy. Im really really getting fat. With all the junk that im munching on every single day with no exercise. Pretty soon im getting cellulite. The very thought of that just makes me wanna crrrryyyy........boohoohooo... *munch munch*

what do we have to do to be very happy? what do we have to own to be very happy?? what do we have to have?? I said very happy. Cuz im happy now... but somehow I need more. more money? actually make that money since I dun have any now. Or a big car????? We're kinda eyeing the Hyundai i30. But cannot afford. :( or a job that gives satisfaction??
Jobs that gives satisfaction pays low. and those im intersted to have, I have no experience. And those that I can apply for I.. im not excited bout it. this sucks.

this sotong strips are good!!!! can't stop chewing on them.........

empty thoughts

I seriously have too much time on my hands and starting to tink too much. I have fallen sick therefore I can't go out to meet clients. And I can't do anything much cuz im so damn weak. Im so bored.

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i wish to back to how I once was. little expectations. while working i felt lost in a never ending race. everyday was just looking forward to lunch. after lunch look forward to finishing work and after work so not looking forward to waking up the next morning. Such a vicious cycle for 3 years.

Hopefully i'll use this time to tink bout life... tink bout what Im becoming. take some time to spend time with people I love.

kenneth and I are such different people. I wonder what is it that makes us able to last all this while.
He is like super outdoors and I hate the sun.
He is super good at keeping friendships with many people while I only need a few close friends.
He is so positve and Im super negative bout everything.
He is so healthy and strong and Im always sick.

I love being alone... watching movies. I love being alone reading my storybooks. But Im glad that Ken came into my life and introduced so many interesting characters to me. =)

Talking bout interesting characters... I miss my friends. But its like not the same anymore.. Maybe it's me that have changed??? Most prolly its me. kinda sad tough but I know theres always the usual few that I can count on. as what I always say. I dun need a lot. I just need a few good ones. =D most of my friends around me are such sweethearts. I really really appreciate u guys a lot. I wonder what I would do without u guys. Sam, Jac, Alicia..... etc


I need to recover quick....

sick sick sick

im having a migraine attack again. this sux.

feeling super super sick and weak. Just when I do not have free medical anymore... I fall sick. boo.

Went for 'guasha' this morning. really cannot take it anymore. blocked ears and migraine. SO XIN KU!!!

thank goodness for Kenneth. I was so weak I can barely eat on my own. After each mouth of noodles I gotta lie down. So in the end I laid in bed while kenneth spoon fed me. Thank you baby. What would I do without u.

hopefully i'll get well soon. Please God.... Heal me... I cannot take it anymore... Im so tired of sleeping. =(

Celebration??

Im like counting down to my unemployed days.... part of me feels relieved, part of me feels scared. A little part of me feels excited of whats to come.

Today marks the day of another chapter of my life. Where Ken and I stop having regular income. its such a scary thought but yet..... i have yet to feel the worry. Instead im looking forward to my break.
Yesterday my boss & colleagues came together to have dinner to "celebrate" my leaving the bank. I feel sad to leave that bunch of people. After working with them all this time, it is indeed difficult and sad to not see them everyday and talk, gossip and complain. But I tink it is something I have to do.......

Hopefully God will bless me and everything will go well. Wheee...

I finally did it~

I finally did it. I finally am leaving my job. It wasn't a easy decision, but it was something i had to do.

And after handing up the letter, i felt relieved. I felt free...... something which have been weighing down on me for so long... juz disappeared.

But the feeling only lasted for a while. Now im thinking of what comes next.

Whats my next move?

Many people says I should find a job before leaving. Some say I should not leave.

Well.... I don't know. But im crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. =D

I bloody suffered from sleepless night last nite. It was so torturous!!! Now its a damn bloody lethargic Sunday for me where im so tired and can't bring myself to do anything else except be a couch potato. I did not even go to church! argg. now my throat hurts. my face is itchy. my nose is running. All because of lack of sleep. THis sux!

The worst thing is I NEED TO WORK TOMORROW. I have 3 weeks left to my notice period and I am so looking forward to it.

bleah

I got really nothing fun or exciting to write about. Haven done anything new. Anything fun. anything exciting. I haven done anything at all for the past few weeks.

Weekdays have been spent working and weekends have been spent alone.

I don't exactly feel lonely when Ken is working. I feel....... bored.

But when im at work I feel bored too. Its like I suddenly feel so bored with everything. I really dun know what to do.

I spent Sat with FJ playing mj cuz Kenneth gotta work. Now now its Sunday and I spent my Sunday cleaning the kitchen and doing laundry. Cuz im bored. The weather is too hot to go anywhere plus im broke. Staying home alone really sucks.

But I know, I know Ken gotta work and Im really okie with it. But im juz BORED! I tink i should just take a nap now. I wish I have people to play MJ with me in the afternoon...

Caleb is at Batam now. So annoying. Dunnoe one mth go Batam how many times. I so jealous. me wanna go too.

Received a postcard from Keong in Japan. I tink its been bout 3 weeks he have been away. So I heard they would be moving to China next. Freaking lucky ass those guys. Get to travel to different countries for months. *sigh* me wanna to0.

Actually im still dying for a white x'mas. A nice, quiet, white x'mas. hmmmm.... sounds good. could this year be the year?????

I really dislike my job now. not fun anymore.... I need a new environment. Im passing day by day. Hour by hour. sometimes the days are so long. sometimes the hours pass so fast.

What are we living for? There's gotta be more to life than this.

im going blind looking at jobstreet.com.

I juz feel like I wanna run. I feel like im stuck, cornered.

Sometimes i feel so fed up. Sometimes i feel so tired. Sometimes I feel like running.

Hopefully, this few hours of staring at the website would have some life changing results.

*crosses fingers*

emo monday

I swear my days are just passing me by. today is such a shitty day.

I was suppose to go for my pilates class but right at the very very last min - I had a migraine. Im now alone at home with a pounding headache with no appetite for dinner. argggg....

Kenneth is out working. I really hope things will go well for him. Hopefully he brings home good news later.

This laptop is totally gonna crash. but im too broke to buy a new one!!! I promise myself I will stop spending so much money. save money. save money.

I really really wish to have a break from work. Im getting really tired. I feel like I dunnoe where im headed everyday. Which explains the reason where Im so emo everyday.

I keep dreaming of goin on a holiday. Somewhere near would be great too. Maybe somewhere with a beach? or snowy mountains.

Sigh. But cant. Kenneth gotta work and earn money. I support him wholeheartedly but I really wish to have a holiday. WHY AM I SO POOR!!!

Allan is getting married. the preparations sounds really fun and exciting. =) kinda happy for him. I wanna get married too..... before i get old and crumpled.

A friend uploaded my secondary school pics on Facebook! wahahaha.... I have never seen that pic before in my life. Its like 12 years ago... damn. so much has changed. I looked so carefree and innocent. thinking I have like a bright future ahead of me. And now? Im stuck in a bank. U never know what life has in store for you.

But I guess no matter how shitty life turns out to be. Im glad God loves me enough to keep me by his side. So no matter how shitty life turns out to be. I still have God. wheeeee.......

im not really in the best of moods the past few days. Feel really bored and lost.
am in a damn emo mood the whole day... argg.

This year's birthday... I gotta say its one of the best ever since I turned 18.
Good food, great company and of course... FANTASTIC pressies!!
I loved every single present that I received this year.

I lurvvvvvveeee the porter bag. Thank you all who contributed to it.

I soooo lurveeeeeee the key chain from Monica.

I loveeeeee the Hello Kitty lamp too!!!!

I *heart* u all so much!
U guys make my life great and I can't imagine my life without u guys.

And to finish up. I had a sucky day at work. And Im feeling damn bloody teary today. Must be the PMS. damn the bleeding.

A very Pink Birthday....

My birthday would be up soon... and well... although im happy that my birthday is coming but it kinda feels the same as any other day. I do not have the same excitement I felt when I was young. prolly cuz now it juz means im getting old. Bleah.
But im still gonna try to have a Happy Birthday. =)
To make this birthday a Happy one... I wanna thank my baby!!
Baby, thanx so much for the bicycle. Its really something different. Something I never expect in a million years. It was really a surprise. A really good surprise to find it in the bedroom. Cuz somehow u know that I want a bicycle except cycle to where.... I have no idea yet. hehe
I love it! Its so cuuuutteeeeeeeeeeee..........



FJ!!! U another sweetie. Thank you. thank you. thank you. for the gift. Im so happy!!! Wheeee.....

I love my gifts, Thank you baby, Thank you FJ. HUGZ!!!

FJ, dun be sad k? I will always be around..... to PLAY MJ WITH U!!! =D

anyways, recently i've been so busy with stuff. Busy with my pilates classes, resistance training classes, gym, swimming, work....

Kenneth is also pretty busy with his property stuff, barely get to spend quality time with him. But I wan him to do well and this is his time to shine. So I shall juz keep myself busy and pray that my bf starts earning money. Wheee... then we can go for holiday!

I hate my job. its getting worse. juz completed a powerpoint for big boss and now I gotta do a poster. JIU WO AH!! This sunday I gotta go back to work for system testing. Pffftt. This sucks. The suckier part? I got a party at my own home to celebrate Jac & my bday and I will be late for it. ARGGG!!!

But nevertheless, im looking forward to seeing the gang, its been a while. so well, hopefully it will be fun!

I miss my bf!!! Especially more when Im sick and home alone. boohoohoo

Anyways. Finally!!! its all done and over with. Wheeee....

Got my results and Im very pleased with it. Its more than what I hoped for. Got distinctions for both my modules. Truly truly glad. THANK GOD!

Started my fitness classes and gym sessions last week. Since the first lesson, I have been walking around everyday with an aching abdomen and aching thighs. But Im taking my first step towards a healthy lifestyle. Feels good sweating it out, which is something I have not done for many many years.

Its a Sunday and Kenneth is back in Tekong. This sucks. But well, we bought a new tv!!!! So cool! Its something we both wanted to buy for a pretty long time but could not bear to. But since now the price is right, we bought without any hesitation. And guess what, Im broke again. But still happy. =)

So now im home with my new 37" TV and there is no nice shows on tv. argggg. -.-"" still ended up watchin mobtv on the laptop.

back to work tomorrow and im soooooo not looking forward to it. Feeling really sick since last nite. and have laid in bed the whole day.... but im still feeling really sucky.

Hope I will feel much better tomorrow to be able to make for my fitness class....*sigh*

The show S Factor is getting really exciting, as in bitchy exciting. Its..... entertaining if I have to say. Really, goin to such extents for the approval of men. GAH.

Wheeepie............

Exams have been over for over a week... and everyday after is full of activities to do. I LOVE IT.

I love not worrying bout exams, bout projects, bout school..... wheeeepeeeee

But being toooo free also means I got more time to spend more money. Which is bad. =(

I've been spending too much recently and gotta start controlling again.

I've signed up for a fitness package with Joycelyn. I feel so healthy already!! Im goin for pilates, kickboxing, gym, hip-hop class.... Im so excited!!

Had a surprised party last nite to celebrate Mama's birthday as well as mother's day. Was cool hanging with my cousins and family the entire day. I feel so happy when I get to see my cousins and grandma. =D I *heart* them. Was suppose to join Sam and the rest at Cafe Del Mar, but was unable to make it cuz grandma got drunk juz drinking 1 glass of wine. But the wine alcohol content was pretty strong. Felt a bit aimless after the party so headed down to Alicia's place for MJ!!!! Wooohooo

Played till i could barely keep my eyes open.

So fast its finally Sat. I got a little time to pen my thoughts down as im washing Kenneth's dirty laundry while he went rock climbing with frens.

There are so many things that I have planned that I always pushed to after my exams. Now its finally the end of my exams and my hoping that I can clear both my modules. Now Its time to start doin the things which I plan to do. Firstly doin some minor redecorating at home. wheee

4 more days...

im having the worst days of my life... maybe not the worst but still terrible. I abolutely hate exams, I hate studying.
I have 4 more days to go before Im freeeee.......
I cant wait.
The stress and anxiety.
Actually, I know I really should be studying. I really really should be, But i feel so sian~!!! when i sit down and stare at my notes.
Even my body starts to shut down.
For every 5mins of reading, I take an hour nap. Arggg... I feel so frustrated with myself. But I juz cant stop watching tv, playing games on Facebook. ITs an absolute nightmare. Ken is not around either which makes things worse. No one to accompany me. to calm me down. to encourage me... =(
But well, im a strong girl. I can do this.
I Promise tomorrow I will put in more solid studying time. yeah rite. But still I will try not to sleep so much.

Wish ken was around. I feel so alone at home. So SAD!!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish i could sleep and all my exams would be over when i wake up.
This is my final lap.
This is my homerun.
I need to do it.
God please help me through.
God grant me perserverance.
God give me strength.
Thank you GOd.

phew

my mid-terms are over. but nothing to be happy about. Its time to rush two major reports, then comes my final exams.
I feel like I can't breathe. But im thankful for the little break that I have after my paper today. A little time for me to let loose and not think and worry bout anything concerning school or work.
Ended up playing mahjong. wheeee....
I wonder why am I so broke all the time. when I haven spent a lot of money recently. pay came and gone just like that. Total bills came up 900+ boohoohoo. to make matters worse, increments and promotions will be put on hold. this totally sucks. but i guess I juz gotta be glad that I still have a job? when i really really dun really feel like working? I dunnoe. Im tired, and confused. and awfully stressed.
Im just looking forward to end April. GOd, give me strength and perseverence.

Anxious

My mid-term exams are starting this week and I have not started studying. Instead Im at work. It sucks to be a part time student with a full time job. Bleah.
Pls hurry hurry.... get me through this 2 months.

Temptations

I really wanna go for a holiday. I wanna go on a road trip. Drive around Australia on our own. I tink it will be pretty fun. Tiring but still fun.

I totally forgot that I needed to do research. All I can tink of now is HRE (Human Resource Economics). I have always been very lousy at maths and now I gotta do econs. Bleah~! i feel so sian ah.

Still considering to head down to Zouk tonite. But I promised myself, today no matter what I need to study. At least a little..... as if it will make a difference. But at least I wun feel guilty right?

Im goin to play my pet now. again.